I never considered myself a leader. Growing up as the youngest child with much older siblings, I was always the last one consulted for any decisions and was likewise the last one to be assigned any responsibility in the household. Being used to this kind of setup, I generally don't take responsibility over things and I don't take initiative or volunteer help unless I'm required to. I became too comfortable with the idea that I'll always be a follower but never a leader.
Last month, CCF held its annual leadership conference with guest speaker Rev. Edmund Chan from the Covenant Evangelical Free Church in Singapore (which I'll definitely check the next time I visit SG). It was tailored for current discipleship group and church leaders and for potential leaders. I wasn't a dgroup nor a church leader, although I recently joined a dgroup, but I joined anyway. I knew I probably won't be able to directly apply the lessons to my current ministry, but I figured they might come in handy someday. Also, I've been getting a prodding that I should start finding opportunities to lead other people - not specifically to lead a dgroup immediately - but to touch the lives of people in my immediate circle and to be more vocal and expressive of my personal faith and convictions.
One major misconception I have about leadership is that, in order to become an effective leader, you should be more conscious of your outward actions so they don't cause your followers to stumble. I realized from the conference that the most important thing about being a leader is staying intimate with God - keeping a relationship with Him and placing Him as first priority in everything you do. Some great thoughts I gathered during the conference:
- "Ministry is an outflow of the Inner Life...Take care of the depth of your life and let God take care of the breadth of your ministry." - Ministry starts from the heart. Before you can be an effective leader, you have to learn how to lead yourself first, and sometimes that's even more difficult.
- Intimacy with God IS the blessing. I've always believed that intimacy with God is a means toward a goal, that I try to be intimate with God for a whole lot of other reasons - to know His purpose, to be confident about His work in me, to have peace in my life. Those may come as added benefits, but being intimate is God is, in itself, a blessing which we should enjoy.
- Happiness is attained through fidelity to a worthy purpose, not through self-gratification. I think pleasing oneself is a short-term goal. You will be exhausted eventually from continuing to keep yourself happy, and you'll probably end up disappointing yourself because there's no real fulfillment in that. We must learn to live for others in accordance with how God wants us to live. That's where we find purpose and fulfillment and ultimately, joy.
- Whatever is at the center of our lives will be our source of power. For that, we should be careful what we center our lives on because it will consume us. To know what's at the center of your life, check on what you spend the most time/most money on.
- We should be submitted to the Holy Spirit, empowered by the Spirit, and directed by the Spirit. Before we are empowered/directed by the Spirit, it is essential that we submit to it and to obey it. Intimacy with God must be coupled with obedience to Him.
These are just some of the notes I got. The conference got me inspired and excited as to how God will work in my life and use me to accomplish His purpose. I don't know yet how God will use me this year, but since 2012 started, I've been praying that God will use me in a big way. I've been joining a group (in my current church and previous church) for so long; I've been attending services for as long as I can remember; I've accepted Jesus as my Savior since I was 9 but I don't feel like I've actually influenced others in a way that would honor God. (Yes, these thoughts come when you're nearing the end of your twenties. Haha) I hope that this year, I will listen more intently to what God wants me to do and that I may be able to apply these leadership principles in my life.
This was the verse at the conference (and will be my verse for the rest of the year):
"One thing I ask from the LORD,
this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the LORD
and to seek him in his temple." (Psalm 27:4)
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